What kind of business: I work, go in for sports, martial arts, I read books, I learn the language, I rarely drink, and the feeling that I am a worthy person, not a mediocrity, does not work.?

You work. How much do you earn? What are you striving for? Where are you on the career ladder? Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Are you where you want to be?

Doing sports. How? And what are your successes, achievements in it? Why?

Martial arts ... What? What are the achievements?

Reading books. What kind? What for? What do they give? Are you just having fun with the artist or are you developing as a person / learning new things at work?

You learn a language. What are the successes? Do you speak it? Do you read freely? Or have you been studying for five years in a row, but still read and translate with a dictionary?

You rarely drink. Rarely is good. Again - how hard are you drinking? You can, after all, once a year, but thoroughly. It is possible several times a year, but with a glass of wine.

My IMHO is that our life and satisfaction from life is determined by our qualitative assessment of our achievements. A qualitative assessment grows from what we personally consider important. For example, (let's take a job) someone needs to have career growth in order to be a director or leader - if this is not the case, then everything is bad. For another person it is absolutely purple whether he has a rank and a personal account, the main thing is that they pay in white more than n amounts. In general, one should not just look at the facts that I “work,” “read,” “do sports,” but how important these facts are for you, how much you invest in them. Maybe, to feel like a cool person, you don't need to practice martial arts and not read books, but go, for example, do yoga or dance salsa, or open a YouTube channel.

Boris, I only get this feeling when I want to prove something to someone, in all other cases I live and enjoy what I do without evaluation, whether it is worthy or not.

Try to reflect on the topic "a decent person is generally who does what, what he thinks and how." There is probably a certain ideal, next to which you may feel that you are smaller.

Explore this feeling, where it grows from, observe when it appears and disappears.

In general, ups and downs of physical and emotional forces are characteristic of a person, and at such moments our mind can do so much toss what you download. Don't give in.