A person stops developing when he has thoroughly sat down in his comfort zone, and no one kicks him in the ass. In principle, it is logical: if I like everything in my life, then why change something? The second question follows from the first question: “Why then I am worried about my level of development, if everything is fine?”.
The answer is very simple. Firstly, not all the convolutions in your head are overgrown with moss, and you are worried that you should have more knowledge in your head (even if you just think about it, it's still better than forgetting it completely).
And secondly, everything in the world is constantly evolving from our Universe to Petka from the neighboring entrance, which suddenly (in 3 years, for example) turned from a gouging student who spent the night at home every three days, into an adult who is already taking pictures his apartment, for the money he earned. And you already notice that when you are 25, and you have through the word mate, then this Peter Sergeevich, looks at you as mentally retarded.
Let's move on to the question itself.
The first thing to look out for is your social circle. As some smart person said: "If you are the smartest in the room, then you are in the wrong room." And after analyzing your social circle, many interesting nuances are revealed.
For example, that you look at life almost like your colleague (one bottle at a bar) Mityai, who, at the age of 40, lives with his mother, and spends all his time either in the bar or watching TV, watching Russian serials and news on the First channel. And I am absolutely convinced that he has nothing because the politicians have not done anything for him. But he knows a lot of funny (no) jokes.
Make a list of your acquaintances with whom you see and contact at least once every 2 weeks (or a month). Describe the pros and cons of communicating, and what happens if you stop communicating with them.
After the correct analysis and filtering of acquaintances, you will have several times less of them, and there will naturally be a desire to fill the void (large or small) with new acquaintances who watch not TV, but plays in theaters, and on Friday in the evening they can be found not in a tavern around the corner, but in a cafe / at an exhibition / at a conference.
And after a couple of weeks you will think about which exhibition is more interesting, and not about what kind of vodka to drink: which is at a 20% discount, but 50 rubles more, or take it as always.
Second what do you spend your free time on.
Imagine: Half of the work is already done, we are trying to mentally match our new friends, and with this desire we are developing without problems. At lunchtime, after discussing the most interesting display of the real life of the homeless (people) displayed at the last photo exhibition, you come home and watch funny (just as funny as the insipid jokes of our old friend Mityai) pictures and videos with breaks for masturbation until late at night. As a result, it turns out that after one or two conversations you will seem to be an intelligent and interesting person, but in reality - Mityai... Although no, if you take into account the height from which you will fall in the eyes of the interlocutor (when you start talking about, presumably, "your" topic in depth), then Mityai (he was not pretending to be smart) will seem like a professor, just a little sycophant.
As with acquaintances, make a list of what you do during the week in your free time, with a note of how much time (maybe approximately) they take per week. For example: a video about cats - 2 hours, counter strike - 10 hours, and so on. Describe the pros and cons of these activities, how much you like them, and remove (or reduce the time allocated) unnecessary. As a result, you will have a lot of free time that can be spent on sports, courses, hobbies.
Okay, we chose a sport, a couple of courses and a good hobby. The question arises: "How can I force myself to start doing this? I can break off at any time." It's not that hard to force. Firstly, you have already made new acquaintances, and in order to be on the topic of conversation, you need to devote time to self-development. And the desire to keep up with everyone (or even overtake everyone in this topic) will make itself felt. Secondly, spend a minimum of personal time at home, because there is a warm bed nearby and there is beer in the fridge, and if you look closely, you need to get out (and nothing that was removed yesterday) and many other distractions.
You can do your hobby outdoors. Sports - gym. You can learn something in cafes / parks / squares / coworking spaces.
What's the best way to learn something? For example, you are interested in the section of physics - mechanics. It is enough to read one paragraph of the textbook, and the desire will disappear. But you can also approach from a practical point of view. Take and disassemble the same engine from an old moped, while figuring out what works and how it works. I think the essence is clear, to approach the issue not directly, like Mityai, but to examine it from all sides, and there you will definitely find something very entertaining.
And third is time management. It was possible not to take it to a separate point, but it would be better that way. When bringing the first 2 points to life, remember to organize your time properly. There is enough information on Google about this.
P. S. There is one good way to motivate. For example, you need to learn English. You find yourself a person (adequate, not Mitya), it is desirable that he was your friend. And you write him a receipt that if you don’t learn during, for example, a year (a friend will check at the end of the term), you will do something very shameful and publicly, or pay your friend a large amount of money. So that all your acquaintances, even people you know little, would know. The main thing is that the fear of not fulfilling this receipt is many times stronger than your laziness
Turn on fantasy. Imagine the life you would like to live. Provide in all details. And then draw up a detailed plan to achieve this goal.
Stop evaluating your position. It makes no sense to evaluate it for a very simple and obvious reason. There are no objective standards for assessing life in nature. They are all invented by other people.
Find support. If there is no one among your loved ones, then it means finding a specialist.