What if you have very low self-esteem, and advice from books and articles does not help?

What if you have very low self-esteem, and advice from books and articles does not help?

Matthew McConaughey - This Is Why You're Not Happy | One Of The Most Eye Opening Speeches

Previous questionCan a man make milk from grass like a cow does?
Next questionHow to estimate the amount of hair lost in a day? How to determine when everything is normal, and when to go to the trichologist?

answers (6)

Answer 1
January, 2021

Here you need to seek help from a specialist. It can be difficult for yourself to raise self-esteem (you need to research what is behind this). It needs to be formed daily by performing special exercises.

Answer 2
January, 2021

Hello! Advice from psychological books and articles usually only helps to get acquainted with the topic in general, with different views on the problem, can help determine this problem if it is unclear.

You have already determined that you have to deal with your low self assessment. Self-esteem begins to build in a person in his very first circle of relationships, in his family, with significant people.

In short, low self-esteem is a disease of relationships. Not enough nourishing attitude towards you from significant figures. The child often mistook the way others judge him to be true about himself. If he is scolded and called clumsy and stupid, he takes it as true information about himself.

You have come to the conclusion that the once accepted assessment of you by other people began to interfere with your full realization in life.

Treating low self-esteem also needs relationships. Best of all, therapeutic, with a psychologist / psychotherapist, because this is a predictable, safe relationship that exists solely to help you, without other goals.

But you can try to independently choose in your environment people who love and appreciate you, and communicate only with such people, limiting communication with people harmful to your well-being.

Try to build high self-esteem for yourself:

Set yourself small tasks in the chosen direction, complete them and you will know for sure where and how you did it, praise yourself for it.

Remember during the day where you behaved in such a way that you began to respect yourself more, and put it in a piggy bank, you can directly start a notebook and review the notes in moments when you doubt yourself.

Have a nice day!

Answer 3
January, 2021

Low self-esteem from failure and fear. Fear, in turn, is an acquired feeling and also a consequence of failures and the negative impact of the environment. It is necessary to analyze whether the current environment is toxic: living conditions, work, loved ones, neighbors. If so, then put all your efforts into changing the environment to a less toxic one. This will be a good result after reaching the goal. In any case, regardless of the environment, one has to do. Anything. Labor and its fruits will help to raise self-esteem. You need to set a goal, even if you are small, and achieve it. You can climb an uncomplicated peak, for example. Then climb a more difficult one (only without heroism).

Answer 4
January, 2021

If you are concerned about self-esteem problems, you estimate that this negatively affects your life, but at the same time you have tried many ways to cope with difficulties on your own, then I would recommend trying to contact a specialist.

A competent psychologist will help you figure out how the problem arose, what prevents you from getting rid of it, and together with you will develop a work plan.

You can find a psychologist on our service, but if you do not have the opportunity to apply for paid help, then you can use the options for free psychological assistance, for example, at the Moscow Center for Psychological Assistance to the Population.

It's the same as with sports training. If you cannot achieve results on your own, then it is always better to resort to the help of a coach who is professionally involved in helping people in such situations.

Answer 5
January, 2021

To score on self-esteem in general)

Realize that your so-called. self-esteem is just a mental, thought loop that works something like this:

  1. I am.

  2. Who am I? What criteria should I use to understand this?

  3. Urgently entering criteria for self evaluation. At the same time, we mistakenly accept as such the signs by which we evaluate other.

  4. We evaluate ourselves in comparison with others.

  5. We get a dull result, because the brain is aimed at looking for danger and threat, which means that it pays attention only to what you are potentially losing to others.

  6. Sad .

  7. Returning to step 2.

You can get out of this loop only by realizing that the error of thinking is inherent in paragraph 1. Within the limits of item 2 - item 7 the problem cannot be solved)

Answer 6
January, 2021

I dare to suggest.
Try to do something yourself.
For example - change the crane, fix the car or something like that.
The next step is something more serious.
For example - make a business plan of someone's business.
Compare with the current ones - make sure of its reality.
Just bring any business to the end.
Self-esteem can be raised only by the results of your work.

Related question

Do insecure people always have low self-esteem?

Read more

What psychiatrists' books can you recommend (relationship breakdown, anxiety, jealousy, trauma of past abusive relationships, low self-esteem)?

Read more

Why do some not-so-nice and not-so-smart people have such inflated self-esteem?

Read more

What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness | Robert Waldinger

Tell me how to wean a girl from self-flagellation and increase her self-esteem, which is at zero? Especially if she is dependent on public opinion.?

Read more

What is very low-calorie you can eat and not feel hungry for a long time?

Read more

Please advise books on the development of self-discipline, to raise self-esteem, study and self-acceptance? So I can download them?

Read more

Why does mood and self-esteem drop after masturbation? And does it somehow affect the body?

Read more

With what books can you start self-study in orthopedic dentistry, if I have zero in it and only dealt with therapy?

Read more

This is Why You Hate Your Writing | THE SECRET ABOUT WRITING ADVICE

Can a person with good self-esteem not want anything? Or does this apply exclusively to people who are insecure?

Read more

I don't get enough sleep all the time, like a zombie during the day. Can you recommend books / articles / materials on this topic? Or your own advice?

Read more

What books on psychological self-help (to reveal hidden fears, to understand yourself, to understand the plan of action) do you find the highest quality and most useful?

Read more

What books / articles should you read to understand the basics of proper nutrition and training?

Read more

What will happen if you continuously and for a very long time strain any muscle (not with the help of physical exertion, but strain them yourself)?

Read more

8 Dream Signs You Shouldn't Ignore

Can you trust the offices that help you get a military ID with the help of legal and medical advice?

Read more

Are there any books that can help overcome unhealthy falling in love (with a scientific psychological approach, as opposed to amateur articles from the Internet)?

Read more

What books can you read to better understand the mechanism of the onset and development of tumors if you do not have a medical education?

Read more

What would you advise the BEST interesting books / articles on the psychology of the CROWD?

Read more

What to do if the sacral spine hurts, and physiotherapy does not help?

Read more

What to do when you're not a 'priority' — Susan Winter

What advice do you have for a diabetic beginner?

Read more

Why, when you have not slept all night, in the morning you start to rave, lose your self-control and feel as if you had a drink?

Read more