At the moment, I myself am in a state of crazy depression. I am a mother of three children, my beloved husband left. Antidepressants don't take me, alcohol is a temporary shelter, and where to go when the kid sees me like this. Watching the video brings me to my senses for 15-20 minutes. There is no strength for auto-training, yoga classes, etc. From pain and despair, I want to fall asleep, and never wake up again ... I understand that I need a specialist psychologist. But unfortunately it is too expensive for me. I think this is the person who will definitely help. After all, first of all, what does a person need? It is already a big step to speak out. Friends, parents. Here you just need to be a listener, a vest ... The main thing is that these same listeners do not give advice.
My personal story proves that an accident, coma, clinical death, twelve fractures, rehabilitation, etc., I just would go crazy from this. My relatives, husband, mother saved me. In such situations, it is very important who is next to you! I saw a lot in a coma and when I was dying and I will tell you for sure, SOUL AND LOVE. This is what will help us cope with any depression.
How to help?
First, just persuade to go to the doctor and establish a diagnosis.
It may be neurosis, not depression or neurotic reactions to situations.
If we talk about depression, then you cannot help without an experienced doctor and medication. This is a very serious and dangerous disease. Don't even try. The best help is finding the right psychiatrist and getting your loved one to accept his help. This is a very difficult task.
Not the one who was lost who got into trouble, but the one who got lost in spirit.
what is depression? It is a mental disorder characterized by depression, sadness, etc. This is such a state of mind. Well, who works with soul? That's right, psychologists, psychiatrists and ... priests. I always and in everything lean to the latter - it is faith in the Truth of Christ and His teaching that is salvation for every person. By the way, His teaching is called the Gospel, which is translated from Greek as Good (good) News. As a life in unbelief, in sin, in vanity and desires of the flesh led to death (and depression to some extent is the experience of death, dying), so a change in the vector, life for the sake of Truth, for the sake of righteousness and spirit will bring Life, Consolation , will fill with meaning and joy. This requires only faith and actions in accordance with it - recognition, repentance, investigation of your life, past mistakes, current situations, in general, all on the advice of the counselor of the Apostle Paul:
16 Pay attention to yourself and to the teaching; do this constantly: for by doing this you will save yourself and those who listen to you. (1 Tim.4: 16)
Once again, depression is a consequence of the path leading to destruction. You need to change your path - here we need radical transformations. Here are a few more "excerpts":
the gate is wide and the path leading to destruction is wide and many go by it; the gate is narrow and the path is narrow, leading to life and few find them. (Matthew 7:13, 14)
19 The works of the flesh are known; they are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, 20 idolatry, magic, enmity, quarrels, envy, anger, strife, disagreements, (temptations), heresies, 21 hatred, murder, drunkenness, outrage and so on like that. I precede you, as I did before, that those who do this will not inherit the Kingdom of God. 22 Fruit of the Spirit : love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, mercy, faith, 23 meekness , abstinence. (Gal. 5: 19-23)
It would be useful to demonstrate that you understand the importance of his problem. You should not use phrases like "this is from idleness", recall the notorious African kids with REAL problems, deny the disease itself, call the sick person a "whiner" and "rag" and give advice in the style of "just get up and go / go to the gym and everything will pass / start smiling and life will improve. " Denial, motivational kicks, and demonstrative indifference are not the best medicine in this state. But understanding, empathy and compassion will be very helpful. If emotional support is not your strong point, then the phrase "I really want to help you. How can I do this?" will become a lifesaver for you. At the extreme, you can just sit next to and demonstrate that you need a person, and you will not leave him in such a difficult period of life. This is also a very important and necessary stage of support.
If you have the desire and resources, it will be great to help your ward to deal with household matters. Sometimes in a state of depression it is difficult even to get out of bed, and there is no talk of any more global things. Help him make an appointment with a doctor, clean up the mess in the house, go shopping, prepare simple meals, deal with taxes, etc. In no case should you starve a person out of the urge "to eat and he will be cured" - the dissatisfaction of basic needs can only worsen the emotional state and finally shake the nervous system.
Try to scare away toxic people from the depressive. If the opportunity arises, persuade him to leave his bullying parents, part with an abusing partner, or cut down on communication with inadequate friends / colleagues. And if you really want to be really, really helpful, try helping him with housing and some finances for the first time. In such a state, he will obviously not have time to fight the villainous fate, and without a roof over his head and money, he can quickly return to his tormentors, since he will have nowhere to go, and there is nothing to live on.
Well , and the rest will be handled exclusively by a specialist. It is he who will be able to choose the right therapy and help your loved one get out of this swamp. Unfortunately, your strength will most likely not be enough for this, and if you need medical support, then even more so. I also highly recommend not to slip into codependency and, if there is such an opportunity, start visiting a psychotherapist yourself. Still, helping a loved one who is in such a terrible situation is not an easy task.
And yes, advice for the future. If you do not need a person, is not important, or you feel that your strength to help is simply not enough, you do not need to mock yourself. It is better to entrust this matter to someone who will cope with it much faster and easier. Taking care of yourself is no less important than helping your loved ones, and with this approach, it is no wonder you yourself get depressed or hate the ward with all your soul.
Mental health to everyone! Moore-moor!
You CANNOT help a person with depression on your own. You can dull the symptoms of depression for a short time - arrange a trip, go to an event, eat spicy food (!). But it will not cure depression, it will just temporarily make the symptoms weaker.
The only thing that can be done is to take the person by the hand and take them to a psychiatrist. Not to a psychologist, this is not in his competence. No soft hints like "Should I go?" Take the hand and lead! A depressed person is unlikely to decide to go to a psychiatrist himself, depression is a swamp from which it is very difficult to get out. A person seeks an excuse for himself, believes that this is part of his character and personality, suffers from apathy - he is VERY unlikely to listen to your advice.
Take - and lead. No one will put a person in a madhouse without his consent. Prescribe treatment, during the course ~ once a week will come to the doctor to monitor the state of health and possible side effects. IN NO EVENT should you take prescription antidepressants without a prescription and medical supervision.
"Person, help yourself." - Ludwig van Beethoven , a neuropsychiatrist or even a psychiatrist. If you do not have a specialized education and practice of working with other people's depression, then I'm afraid you wanting to do the best you can do harm.
Well, a good specialist will identify the causes of a depressive state and prescribe treatment: some pills, and someone - then a course of long-term psychotherapy.